I used to be like Chicken Little. I did. If one tiny small setback or hard thing happened, I would act like everything was awful and the sky was literally (but figuratively) falling. Every time I look at Facebook’s “On This Day” thing-a-ma-jig, I am reminded I played the role of Chicken Little for the majority of my facebook having years. All of the complaints and all of the “I try so hard and have no fun and nothing ever works out for me” and other equally gross stuff.
It took me a lot of years to realize God did not make little ole me to be Chicken Little. After I figured it out, it took me no time at all to realize God actually didn’t make anyone in the world to act like Chicken Little. Not Chicken Little, not chickens with our heads cut off. Not chickens, period.
I focus grouped this self-evaluation today and my long-term best friends confirmed that they, too, have noticed I am becoming increasingly less dramatic and Chicken Little-esque. If I were to vouch for anything in the world, it would be the validity and integrity of my focus group. If they say it’s a real thing, it is. So it is. If I can become less like Chicken Little, I think other people can, too.
I can’t remember the exact time frame when I stopped acting like Chicken Little, but if I were to guess it probably aligned pretty closely with feeling like my little tiny world was actually falling a part, in a dramatically exaggerated but sincere way. After months of crying all the time I realized it was no way to live and there must be something better to the world. From there, I metamorphasized into a little butterfly who just loves everyone always and is the most optimistic little human you’ll ever even meet because I learned that even when everything feels like the weight of everything should be paralyzing, goodness you can still actually MAKE. SOME. MOVES.
[[My people tell me I give spot-on self-analyses. Are you going to tell me I’m not a little butterfly who loves everyone always and is the most optimistic little human you’ll ever meet?!]]
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In a practical way, this is what that reframing process looked like for me yesterday:
The election did not turn out how I hoped or expected it too, and I was really upset about it. From there, my feelings started to do the former Chicken Little snowballing thing and I started to imagine that all of the other good opportunities that have presented in my life recently would also fizzle out and go nowhere. Because black-and-white, Chicken-Little thinking says if one thing goes wrong everything will go wrong: Trump won the election, and I’ll never get the job I want. Great logic, right?
So I kicked myself, and laughed at myself a little, and decided to not backslide into my old ways and created a backup plan instead. My new backup plan, in the event my awesome plan A does not work out, is to start taking classes in the Spring for a doctoral degree in Education so I can one day help improve education systems in lower income neighborhoods in the United States and abroad, and then continue to apply for new jobs, too.
Coming up with a backup plan and taking the steps to meet someone in the doctoral program not only made me feel more hopeful and capable, but it also added to the beautiful goodness of my plan A (instead of just getting the job I want, GET THE JOB I WANT AND GET THE DOCTORAL DEGREE AND GET STUFF DONE). My plan A is the best plan, and I am so excited about it, but my backup plan is pretty extraordinary, too.
Instead of feeling like failure was inevitable, I made a plan so celebration is inevitable. It’s a better, braver way to live.
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We weren’t made to kick rocks and pout. When bad days and bad news come, instead of being Chicken Little let’s all be brave instead, questioning what we can do in response. And there is always something to do. Always.
I think we were all made to be brave. On days when everything is going wrong, and even on days when everything is going just fine, we were made to say hard things and do hard things and try things we have never done before but know we have to do.
I think brave is the best thing to be. Lately my friends have called me brave and fancier synonyms for brave (like brazen or bold or audacious) a lot and every single time it makes my little soul sing and typically shed little happy, disbelief tears. Disbelief because I spent most of my life being Chicken Little and very little of it being brave.
AND YOU KNOW WHAT? Telling people they are brave has become my favorite thing to do. I have noticed they happy cry 100% of the time. I am not exaggerating. People always cry when I tell them they are brave. People I know, people I have just met, all of the people cry when told they are brave.
Do you know what else happens when people, including me, are told they are brave? They suddenly believe they have the capacity and the permission to actually go out and be the thing you just said they are. They stop feeling like Chicken Little and like their own little section of the sky is falling in on them and suddenly they have the courage to take autonomy of their little life and do something wonderful.
We did not hike this weekend to climb the tall jaggedy cliff, but we did come to tell other people they were brave and strong enough to climb the tall jaggedy cliff. :)
Then it starts snowballing from there folks! Instead of feeling like everything is awful and the worst, one starts feeling like everything is awesome and God is moving in every way and suddenly your little life doesn’t feel so little or inconsequential anymore, and the world doesn’t seem so big and threatening and scary.
Even though we live in a country where our President-Elect is less than beloved, and even if the sky does end up falling and the world is actually ending, the same God who made it is still in control and we are to be brave and unafraid. He made us to be brave, and that is what we are. SO LET’S BE BRAVE AND GET STUFF DONE.
